Self help books for kids

Coming soon to a bookstore near you:

  • You’re kidding: 21 ways to a more impactful childhood
  • Wake up kid: your youth is fading
  • Wasted youth no more
  • Self-start: for kids with shitty parents

 

The Goodbye Party

Mark and Kelly said goodbye to the money and a displeased Mr. Pepmore. Perhaps they decided to deny their recent woes and fate, or being near each other ignited their feelings of safety.

Either way, they happily walked out the Union Square Hotel holding hands and skipping some times. They simply enjoyed each other’s company.

Their carefree affection stopped for a moment while Kelly fished for her MetroCard , but otherwise bliss continued in the subway station and on the L out to the Graham stop in Williamsburg.

Above ground, Mark and Kelly sauntered along affectionately.

They stopped off at a bodega realizing they needed to bring something. Read More »

Fightin’ words

Fightin’ words, that’s what you heard.

If I survive tonight, then I’ll be all right.

But words are proud, and I say them loud.

They’re fightin’ words, that’s why you hurt.

Plastic is drastic

Is plastic in our blood now because we are evolving into machines? Or cause we already are?

The Klash

The Klash is a fashion victim turned super hero. The Klash (k not c, so as to avoid copyright issues with the great 80s band) fights crime wearing a mish-mash of styles, colors and patterns that confuses criminals.

Weapon of choice: the Klashnikov

Not to be confused with the AK47, the K fires rubber bullets that explode on targets’ bodies with a set of industrial dyes of dazzling colors, all of which have never been animal tested and are strictly vegan, etc, and temporarily render the criminals bedazzled.

Just in time for a quick fashionable cuffing and makeover before being handed over to the police, usually saying the catchphrase: “You’ll look great for your court date.”

Candelabras on a beach

What else do you need?

You ready for this good day?

“You ready for this good day?”
“You know it.”
“All right, all right have a good one then.”
“You too.”

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One space it

If you care about the environment, only place one space after periods (full stops) not two.

And when listing things of three, cut that serial comma before and.

The Duck and the Cat

Holding a mallard. Being given water, and a white cat on snowy river banks, as part of some team survival, scavenger game level thing. Not many supplies. Find them along the way. Like a pair of white sneakers with bright blue stripes, slightly hidden in sand. Put them on. Hope they fit. Run and follow the duck and cat: getting ready for something…

Suspicious

Suspicious, vicious fishes make delicious, nutritious dishes.